On the morning of December 10, 2024, angels from the Gates of Heaven escorted my dear friend, Donna Toliver-Grimes, to heaven. Lord God, you transformed Donna's "mourning into dancing; you took away [her] sackcloth and clothed [her] with gladness" (Psalm 30:12). I can imagine that in her final moments, she whispered these words, feeling the angels' loving touch: "Into your hands, I commend my spirit ..." (Psalm 31:6).
As someone told me recently, the Church will miss this wonderful soul. I share their sentiments. Donna was one of the four original writers who contributed to Eat the Scroll Ministry's publication, Hallelujah People: A Daily Reflection on the Gospels for African American Catholics, in 1992. She gave her life to building the lives of Black Catholics while recognizing the need for the Roman Catholic Church to address their racist rhetoric that continues to steal, kill, and destroy all communities of faith.
St. Teresa of Avila Church in Washington, D.C., is where I met Donna. Her infectious simile drew one into seeing God's love in her eyes when meeting her. She displayed the compassion of Jesus, wanting to "proclaim liberty to captives and recovery of sight to the blind, to let the oppressed go free, and to proclaim a year acceptable to the Lord" (Lk. 4:18-19).
Donna cared for the poorest of the poor, the residents in prison establishments, and individuals without homes. She exemplified Catholic Social Teaching. As our relationship developed, I witnessed in her marriage how her family strove to be a holy family. With prayer during the Christmas season, you would see Donna and her late husband instilling Nguzba Saba, the principals of Kwanzaa, into their family. We grew together as our two families tried to mirror the Holy Family and promote the Kwanzaa value system. With joy, we would call each other to say, "Habari gani?" or “What’s happening?” This symbiotic relationship brought us together with the expectation that we would grow spiritually, working together for years. We did for over thirty-plus years physically in ministry. We will work together while she resides with the angels in heaven.
I want to share one of Donna's most outstanding mantras. These words are in Donna's book All God's People: Effective Catechesis in a Diverse Church. Donna said, "Plan With, Not For, People" (pg. 32). In this saying, Donna, a wise sage, encourages ministers and leaders in multicultural environments to embody a spirit of inclusivity by advocating for the freedom of all of God's children. The insight here is that one must first avoid assuming that one's academic background or culture is superior to those being served. Often, the voices of the people we minister to are muted when planning prayer services or outreach programs. Donna believed that we must be deliberate and inclusive. The key is to invite people to participate in the planning process. Listening to the community's voices empowers those we serve. Donna consistently sought ways to advocate for all groups by inquiring and attuning to the needs expressed by the people, thereby planning with and not for them.
On a personal note, I will always be thankful for my friend because she first opened my eyes to the disparity in church prison visitation. Her spiritual guidance helped me recognize that many prison ministries primarily focus on male prisoners, often neglecting female inmates. This realization prompted me to reflect on this social injustice. I began to understand that many men do not visit their children's mothers or their girlfriends in prison for various reasons. One reason may be that some believe there are plenty of other women they can see on the outside and have fun with. Unfortunately, there is a lot more that can be said on this subject matter. My point is that our society often gives up on women more readily than on men, and this includes the Church.
I joined Donna in her mission to remind women that God and their community love and support them. One year, we created Valentine's Day cards for women living in prison. Writing prayers and drawing colorful hearts on the cards made me feel I was extending Jesus's love. Through this experience, I learned that both men and women need the Gospel of Jesus Christ's message, whether within prison walls or outside of them.
"Eternal rest grant unto Donna, O Lord, And let perpetual light shine upon her. May she enter into that sacred promised land, where peace is incomparable. May she be with the Lord all the days of her life while dwelling in the house of the Lord. Donna, you are blessed because of your soulful peacemaking. May you, my dear sister from another mother, rest in peace, power, and the prophetic word - Ashe`!" Take Donna to the King of Kings. Evangel./Prof. Michael P. Howard, MACS.
This is a special message from Dr. Ansel Augustine. People can post memories/pictures or send a note to the family on this site: https://www.kudoboard.com/boards/ggfpTMLz I will take the site down by 12/22, and the messages/posts will be turned into a book that will be a gift for the family.
댓글